sometimes

sometimes

the boy you wrote a poem for

dies anyway

sometimes

the homeless man

sleeping in a car park

the one you rang about

the one that was placed

in a shelter near Shepherds Bush

ends up two weeks later

sleeping in an alleyway the other side

of the building

sometimes

you wait with someone as they die

and they go

in the middle of the night

when you are not there

and you say

you say to a friend

"these rivers 

must lead somewhere"
sometimes

the fairy tale ending

is a fairy tale

sometimes
your on the 09:39 from Waterloo
non stop between Clapham and Farnborough
and your late

because the train hit the boy or the boy hit the train

and you try to make sense

of all the things that ended

and began again

sometimes 

you smile when nothing is comfortable

violating symmetry

and you hope

into the empty dark you made

until the sky

laughs at you 

with fistfuls of rain